giving thanks

thanksgiving used to be one of my favorite holidays.
i love the food and time spent with family.
i love the reason for it. to force ourselves to stop and {hopefully} take a whole day being grateful.

i used to love it, until my grandma carol died two days before thanksgiving.
wasn't she stunning.

now, a holiday that used to be so joyous and full, eight years later, still feels a little empty and sad.
i make the best of it and strive to find the joy and thanks in the day and in all the days for that matter. remembering how joyful and generous of a person she was helps.

other than the year she died, this was by far the hardest thanksgiving i've ever had.
and that means it was worse than the year we had the stomach flu and couldn't eat all the yummies.

the hubby worked and so i took all three kids to the station to be with our fire family instead.
i did this alone.
big mistake.

he works for one of the busiest fire houses in l.a. city. so needless to say we didn't get to see him very much for the 3 hours we were there. i'm going to guess it was a total of 45 mins? and those 45 mins were during the meal, and during the meal all three of my children decided it was official meltdown-in-front-of-the-entire-station-and-make-mommy-crazy-time.
we were a sight i'm sure.

on the drive home i balled my eyes out.
and then when i stopped i remembered that i am a crazy person with so very much to be thankful for.
i started listing all the things i have to be thankful for...a mini one thousand gifts if you will.
and i thought i'd share...

-a savior.
-healthy family.
-a job for my husband.
-that he works at a station with fellow believers.
-my mom, who after a long day of traveling comes to my house and bathes my kids for me.
-my husband and his constant love and wise counsel.
-my sweet boy.
-my crazy and way to adorable girl.
-my heaven smelling baby girl.
-our car.
-clean water.
-food in the fridge and our bellies.
-hot water.
-a warm bed.
-the ability to buy our children christmas gifts.
-the wisdom of wiser older women.
-dear friendships that allow me to be vulnerable with no judgement.
-my son's friendships.
-my crockpot.
-my sister, who tolerates my constant mothering of her.
-christmas music.
-our home.
-my dad, who has never stopped loving me no matter how hard i've ever been on him.
-our church.
-the wonderful people in our church community.
-my husbands family and my extended family.
-the way my children are loved on by our families.

i could go on forever, and i'm sure your list is similar. i hope everyone enjoyed a holiday filled with good food and family.

i know i am looking forward to this christmas season with much excitement and anticipation, but with a healthy dose of "it could be a real disaster" too. either way we'll make it thru and look back with laughter.


  1. What station is Brent working out of now? Thinking about you!

  2. Amy, I just read this today, and I needed this reminder so much. I too miss our loved ones so much this time of year, but I have to remember when I have days like yesterday, how truly blessed I am. You are one of my greatest blessings and I love, respect and value you more than you will ever know.


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